Well, it’s a new day over here at Sarasota Magazine. The staff, me included, is now expected to work twice as hard—and for no increase in pay. We’ve had all sorts of new “tasks” dumped in our laps.

Scene: a TV studio. Mr. Chatterbox sits on Oprah's couch, looking as if he might cry. OPRAH: I feel duped. I feel you lied to me, Mr. Chatterbox. Your new book, A Million Little Parties, comes out, ...